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[about the author]

i actually like speaking in front of large crowds. freakish, eh?

i work crossword puzzles in ink.

i am the american nigella lawson. or maybe the american eddie izzard. can't decide, really.

i would be a really good mom, but i'm cool with being a really good aunt.

i am sometimes more perceptive than i would like to be.

i am fiercely loyal. sometimes, stupidly so.

i never play dumb. never.

i am way too hard on myself.

i am a change agent.

i sometimes cross that fine line between assertive and aggressive.

i am not afraid to tell people that i love them.

i am militantly pro-choice.

i am pro-adoption.

i know a little bit about alot of things.

i typically enjoy the company of men more than women.

i am capable of being really mean and nasty, but i fight it. hard.

i am a lifelong cubs fan. do not laugh.

i have been known to hold a grudge.

i have hips.

i am not my sister.

i am lousy at forgiving myself.

i am an indoor kind of gal.

i am a bargain shopper. to the point of obsession.

i am 32 flavors. and then some.

[the ones people ask about]
Rittenhouse Review
Investment Banking Monkey
Cheap Ticket News
iPhone News
Hotels and Travel News
Latest on Retirement Planning
Consumer News and Reviews

[in case you were wondering]

[the blogger behind the curtain]

[100 things about me]

<< current

[all content copyright 2007 by tequila mockingbird. seriously.]


it's just your usual monday morning round-up of random stuff i thought about over the weekend. exciting, eh?
while it might have appeared to a casual third-party observer that i was simply shoving reese’s cups in my piehole, i’ll have you know that it was actually done in the name of science.

i can now, officially, without question, unequivocally state the following:

the little tiny reese’s cups just don’t taste as good as the big ones. nor do they taste anywhere close to as good as the reese’s peanut butter eggs.


no idea.

more research is clearly warranted.


the front of the latest issue of gq magazine features a pictures of jennifer garner on a harley. but that’s not what caught my attention. no. it was this:

is dmx the new tom cruise?

why, yes, yes, i think dmx is the new tom cruise! i don’t know why i didn’t see the similarities before. i mean, both have been arrested for…well, for lots of stuff. right? and, both have been in movies with steven seagal. right? both vied for the guest-rapper spot on that limp bizkit rollin’-rollin’-rollin’ track. and both are black. and, although most people don’t know this, both are really named earl simmons.

if it had been a snake, it would have bitten me in the ass.


sometimes, when you’re getting a bagel in the morning, and you’re standing there and you’re waiting on your order to come up, sometimes you might feel uncomfortable just standing there without talking to the kid behind the counter. if that happens to you, you might think it would be kind of funny to say, “so…do you get a lot of wiseguys who come in here and say, ‘i see bread people?’”

but, you’d be wrong.

because the kid will just look at you and say, “i just started last week, so i don’t know.”


i am baffled by how a perfectly sane, completely hygienic, reasonably intelligent, grown-ass woman would leave a pizza out on the counter all night and then get up the next morning and eat it right out of the box.

sure, this was commonplace behavior in college. but, we were young. we were invincible. we didn’t fear things like botulism. or even a nasty case of food poisoning.

i mean, would i leave pork chops out on the counter all night and then get up and eat them the next morning? hell, i’m careful these days about eating any mayonnaise-based salad that’s been sitting outside for more than an hour at a summer bbq. so, what is it about pizza that is so magical as to make me act as though it is exempt from the basic laws of food handling and safety?
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