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[about the author]

i actually like speaking in front of large crowds. freakish, eh?

i work crossword puzzles in ink.

i am the american nigella lawson. or maybe the american eddie izzard. can't decide, really.

i would be a really good mom, but i'm cool with being a really good aunt.

i am sometimes more perceptive than i would like to be.

i am fiercely loyal. sometimes, stupidly so.

i never play dumb. never.

i am way too hard on myself.

i am a change agent.

i sometimes cross that fine line between assertive and aggressive.

i am not afraid to tell people that i love them.

i am militantly pro-choice.

i am pro-adoption.

i know a little bit about alot of things.

i typically enjoy the company of men more than women.

i am capable of being really mean and nasty, but i fight it. hard.

i am a lifelong cubs fan. do not laugh.

i have been known to hold a grudge.

i have hips.

i am not my sister.

i am lousy at forgiving myself.

i am an indoor kind of gal.

i am a bargain shopper. to the point of obsession.

i am 32 flavors. and then some.

 
[the ones people ask about]
Rittenhouse Review
Investment Banking Monkey
OOPS
Cheap Ticket News
iPhone News
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Latest on Retirement Planning
Consumer News and Reviews
 

[in case you were wondering]

[the blogger behind the curtain]

[100 things about me]




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[all content copyright 2007 by tequila mockingbird. seriously.]


 
2.17.2003  

mmmmm...bacon
first off, i'd like to give a hearty thanks, jackass to whoever scheduled the storm of the century for my three-day weekend.

having said that, let's review what's been going on here over the course of the last three snowbound days:

- organized all sweaters by color. then by sleeve-length. then by neckline. then, my head exploded.

- spent hour upon endless hour reviewing the mirror project. then, spent next day and a half looking for any and all reflective surfaces in my house, trying to take artsy, yet still flattering, self-portrait. realized this is impossible. took about 437 pictures of snow, instead.

- thanked god that i have 144 cable channels. cursed his name when i remembered that there is never anything worth watching on any of them. seriously, not a single one. put on telemundo and hit the mute button. left it on like that for hours. no idea why.

- stared into pantry looking for something to eat. see nothing appealing, despite enormous amount of food. close pantry door. open pantry door again moments later, as if pantry elves would have magically replenished food supply with yummy pre-prepared goodness. stunning disappointment. evidently, pantry elves are without four-wheel drive vehicle.

- practiced photoshop skills by placing hello kitty's head on body of every member of my family. then, chococat's head. then, the head of that conductor guy in conjunction junction. then, south park characters. then, i made us all blue! must. get. out. of. house.

- spent 20 minutes layering clothing onto body in preparation for going outside to snap even more artsy snow photos [ed. note: but these would be nighttime photos. totally different than the previous 437 snow photos.]. despite 73 layers of clothing and gale-force winds resulting in virtual white-out, manage to walk down four flights of stairs and out into freezing-ass night only to discover that the battery in my digital camera is kaput after having snapped 437 snow photos earlier that day. make way back up stairs.

- haloscan: totally crapped out. blogger: errors publishing new posts. me: trying to send hate mail to both services, and having aneurysm because, after pressing send, i receive a message that the hotmail server is too busy to send my message. briefly consider taking more snow pictures to distract myself.

i did learn one very important thing, though: never underestimate the simple goodness of a bacon sandwich. at some point in my life, somebody convinced me to stop eating bacon. probably for health reasons or some such nonsense.

whatever, people.

bacon is the nectar of the gods and i shall never again be denied its smoky goodness.

and that's the report from ice station zebra.
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