[about the author]
i actually like speaking in front of large crowds. freakish,
i work crossword puzzles in ink.
i am the american nigella lawson. or maybe the american eddie
izzard. can't decide, really.
i would be a really good mom, but i'm cool with being a really
i am sometimes more perceptive than i would like to be.
i am fiercely loyal. sometimes, stupidly so.
i never play dumb. never.
i am way too hard on myself.
i am a change agent.
i sometimes cross that fine line between assertive and aggressive.
i am not afraid to tell people that i love them.
i am militantly pro-choice.
i am pro-adoption.
i know a little bit about alot of things.
i typically enjoy the company of men more than women.
i am capable of being really mean and nasty, but i fight it.
i am a lifelong cubs fan. do not laugh.
i have been known to hold a grudge.
i have hips.
i am not my sister.
i am lousy at forgiving myself.
i am an indoor kind of gal.
i am a bargain shopper. to the point of obsession.
i am 32 flavors. and then some.
how fun was that?!
so so fun, that’s how fun was that.
any time i go to a social thing by myself there’s always a bit of hesitation. especially when it’s a social thing where most of the other people there know one another. and do not know me. i don’t break out in a cold sweat or anything like that. but maybe that’s just the certain dri. anyway, it might be a perfectly normal human thing, or i could be a loon. either way.
but, i knew that i’d recognize at least one face at last night’s blogorama, so i went right ahead and went.
and the first face i saw when i walked through the door was the one i knew:
within approximately .2 seconds of seeing andrew again, i officially decided to stalk him. i should have been stalking him for months, but i sort of chickened out. of course, by now, he’s probably dating someone. or at least married. but, i will not be deterred by such petty annoyances. after reading his writing and seeing him again last night, several things have spurred me to finally commit to my stalking:
1. he’s frighteningly smart. brilliant, even. oh how i love this.
2. the hair.
3. the cheekbones.
4. the red pocket square.
and don’t think i don’t know that stalking andrew is so fifteen minutes ago. every chick on the interweb is already stalking andrew. or has stalked him in the past. i know, i know. so, in an effort to reinvent the idea of stalking andrew, and make it fresh again, i’m thinking of starting a fan fic site. i feel confident this will go a long way with andrew in demonstrating my commitment as well as my creativity.
did i mention the fact that i managed to leave blogorama last night having uttered approximately one word to andrew: “hi.”
yeah, my stalking efforts are slightly hindered by the fact that seeing andrew is akin to mr. sherman and peabody putting me in the wayback machine and transporting me to the ninth grade homecoming dance when tim spradling asked me if i wanted to dance with him to arthur’s theme [aka that “moon and new york city” song] and i just stood there with my eyes bugging out of my head and my mouth hanging open until the song was pretty much over. it’s entirely possible i actually made a spit bubble.
so, clearly, my longstanding history of being a total dork in the presence of a hot guy is still alive and kicking me in the head.
i don’t know. maybe i should forget the fan fic and just call him.
riiight. fan fic it is.
speaking of smokin’ hot, i met jen. jen is definitely smokin’ hot. i also met jen’s boyfriend, brendon. brendon is definitely smokin’ hot. if my basic math skills serve me, i’m pretty sure that this should work out something like this:
1 smokin’ hot person + 1 smokin’ hot person = 2 smokin’ hot persons
but, with jen and brendon, this is not the case. it’s more like:
1 smokin’ hot person + 1 smokin’ hot person = definite fire code violation
seriously, i was scared to stand too close to them. it was like a great white show. now, i’m nowhere near as smart as andrew, but i believe this is what is referred to as synergy. they’re gorgeous, they’re smart, they’re funny, and they’re clearly hot for each other. if they weren’t so irresistibly likeable, i might consider hating them. but, instead, we’re going to hang out and drink cocktails together. and there was much rejoicing.
i also had the best surprise ever: sid! and his hair! here i thought sid was still in tokyo, so i didn’t even bother sending him an email saying “hey, why don’t you stand me up again for blogorama!” then, in walks sid. and we hug and he pinches my cheeks, and maybe rubs my tummy. i say “maybe” because i’m just not sure. there was a lot of tummy rubbing last night, so it was hard to keep it straight. by the end of the night i was worried that i looked like i’m expecting. even some guy who i knew for only about two minutes touched my tummy. it was like i had a big magnet in my tummy. or a sign that said “rub me for good luck.” hopefully this was only a one-night thing and i won’t be accosted daily on the street from now on.
anyway, sid gave me the best – and worst – news ever: he got an awesome job. in tokyo. and he actually has to go there to live, being as how that’s where the job is. i’m very happy for sid, but his leaving makes me sad. i know we’ve only seen one another a couple of times, but just knowing sid was here, making dc a cooler place, gave me comfort. plus i always swore i was going to call him and we were going to hang out. and now, when i swear that, i’ll know for sure it’s not going to happen. all i know is sid’s going away will make me sad.
in totally unrelated news, despite the fact that i did not believe it was possible, sid’s hair is, perhaps, even better than it was before. the man’s hair is worthy of a shrine.
i also had a chance to talk to some terrific folks whose pages i've read, and it’s great to have a chance to put faces to pages;
julian, of course, our fearless blogorama organizer whose sartorial prowess knows no bounds. julian knows a great deal about graphic novels and anime. he also has a lighter with an 18” flame. just standing in the same room with julian makes me feel incredibly uncool.
i met jim, who explained to me in very logical and precise terms why i have not had a date in 18 months. apparently, this is due entirely to the fact that i live in maryland. i’m pretty sure jim has some sort of three-color presentation with charts and graphs to verify his assertion.
i also met another jim. this one, like the first one, writes a political blog. [hey, it’s dc…most of them are political blogs.] anyway, unlike the first one, this jim did not allege that i am undateable because i live in maryland. thank you, jim number two. you give me hope.
i also had the pleasure of meeting jen [yes, everyone at blogorama is named jen or jim. or julian or julia.] i’ve been a reader of her writing for a while, and have corresponded with her in the past, so it was wonderful to have a chance to meet her. it’s so surreal to stand in a room full of people you’ve never met and feel that you already know. anyway, i’m bummed because i have the distinct impression that jen and i could hang out on a very regular basis…but she’s moving to chicago. and i forgive her for that. so long as she roots for the cubs.
i also met courtney, who was incredibly nice and incredibly cute and i’m not just saying that because she said such wonderful things about me. really.
finally, no blogorama would be complete without lex. lex definitely rubbed my tummy. and said the nicest things. and gave me tons of hugs. yes, i’d say an evening with lex was just what the doctor ordered. he’s a charmer, not to mention he looked really spiffy in his thursday finest. i think fatherhood agrees with him.
now aren’t you sorry you stayed home to watch “the most bestest episode of friends in the history of the world”?
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